Letting go of old stories through EMDR and expressive therapies
Our understanding of who we are and the experiences we have been through is defined by the stories we tell. Not just the stories we say out loud–like the time we were embarrassed at a school assembly, or how we got our first job or met a romantic partner–but the ones we may not even know we have internalized. You might have grown up with the story “family should be loyal to one another” or “family will let you down”. You might have learned “my health is in my control” or “not being productive is lazy and shameful”. It could be a general sense of “I have to prove my worth”, or a specific belief, “the shape of my body is flawed”.
These stories belong in the past, with the memories they came from. Instead, we carry them with us like a backpack full of heavy weights.
What’s the point of therapy for chronic illness?
When you live with chronic illness, it defines so much of your life, even though it only captures a small part of who you are.
There are very real implications to chronic illness (limited energy, many appointments, ongoing stress, isolation), but so much of the shame and emotional pain around chronic illness is due to the messages we receive about what chronic illness means about us. Our culture tells us that we are not valuable if we aren’t “productive”. And that we are a drain on society or our loved ones. And that if we only took better care of ourselves, we wouldn’t be struggling.
Wheel of Emotions
This image is frequently used by therapists to help clients get more specific about what they are feeling. Start in the middle to identify your overall feeling and then look at the corresponding feelings in the bigger circles to narrow it down.
Tapping Meditation from EMDR
Tapping Meditation from EMDR for self-regulation. Using a nice, slow pace, you can tap your hands on your chest, like a butterfly, or in a hug around your arms, or on your lap (or even on a table or desk).
Trauma and The Body
In theatre, we understand that humans use our bodies constantly to perform, even when we are not aware of it. An actor embodies a character, changing the behaviors, language, and appearance they usually assume in order to become someone else.
Our bodies are constantly performing the roles we have learned to play, like mother, teacher, neighbor, and friend, and they are also the sites of our suffering and joy, of our oppression and privilege.